Category Archives: Free Fallin’

About Heroes …

Johnny-Cash

*** As you may have noticed, I have been absent for a while here. Not to worry, all is well! I just elected to step away and take care of some other pressing matters that needed attention in one form or another. So, I am back. Thanks for visiting here with us. ***

I have noticed that lately, every time I turn on the TV, some media outlet is telling me that “so and so is a hero.” Possibly this has been going on for a while, and I am just now noticing? There are reasons that I am not having any of this. First of all, when did we relinquish our perception, our moral standard(s), and our choice to the great void out there that is “The Media,” including so-called Social Media? Secondly, the entities that are held up as heroes today are, for the most part, “the flavor of the week.” Whatever is being pushed down the public’s throat by someone’s agenda, whether that agenda is political, financial, religious, and/or corporate, somewhere in that agenda resides a genuine “hero” by golly!

In my mind, Johnny Cash was a hero. He stuck to his guns and advocated for the prison population at a time when doing so was very unpopular. (It still is!) He fought his way back from the bottom that comes with the self-destructive behavior that often accompanies addiction. He rebuilt his life from the bottom up. He fought for the love he wanted in his life, even though he had to win her back. Although he was not a perfect man, he was an empathetic, giving, humble man.

I have a friend who is a musician. He used to play guitar, and then he was injured in an accident and can’t play anymore due to lessened mobility in his arms. Although he is now in a wheelchair, he rebuilt his his career playing harmonica. He does as many live performances as he can. This past spring he was nominated by his peers for the Best New Artist CD Blues Music Award. That is someone that doesn’t let life get him down. My friend triumphed in the face of adversity. He is a hero.

Helped fund treatment for a friend or donated an organ to save a life? You are a hero!

To me, a single mother who works two jobs, goes to school, and still finds time to guide and raise decent human beings is a hero.

To me, every soldier that fights for our country, and returns to a mostly indifferent nation, is a hero.

To me, Mohammed Ali is a hero. He stood up for his convictions, even when it cost him the Heavyweight Championship. He took his case to the Supreme Court, and won.

To me, people that stand up for what they believe are heroes:

People that advocate for a Woman’s Right To Choose

People that advocate for Voting Rights for all

People that advocate for Marriage Rights for all

People that advocate for those that are less fortunate than themselves

The teachers in Newtown, CT that sacrificed themselves to save their students from an insane gunman are heroes

Mothers, Fathers, and caregivers who go to work each day, hating their jobs, working long hours for dismal pay, trying to meet their responsibilities at home and pay for schooling to advance in life – they are heroes.

People that advocate hate are NOT heroes.

Politicians that disregard the poorest among us are not heroes.

Those who endeavor to treat women as second class citizens by paying them less than men for the same work, limiting their access to health care and birth control, and forcing them to have unnecessary medical procedures prior to obtaining medical care, are NOT heroes.

I am a firm believer in “I can’t describe it, but I know it when I see it.”

Underneath all the bluster, social media, and BS, we all know who the real heroes are.

Guest Post at The Daily Gallen: Perseverance

 

Please visit Tim Gallen’s great site, The Daily Gallen, to read my take on Perseverance.

While you are there, read some of his wonderful posts and observations on life.

 

©Kerzner 2002/2012

©Kerzner 2002/2012

 

“Perseverance” at The Daily Gallen

Gratitude: Happy Valentine’s Day Dear!

Vinoy-Hibiscus

So: What do Valentine’s Day and gratitude have in common, you may ask? In my case, quite a lot actually. This is my third (count ’em folks, that’s three!) marriage. You know what they say: “Practice makes perfect!” Well … I’m not sure about the perfect part, but on the whole, it is pretty damn good.

Consider that my wife could’ve had anyone she wanted. No, seriously. She was hotter than hot (as in “Finer than frog hair”). She had a great job, her own house, a killer vintage hot rod, and a good head on her shoulders. It’s not like she needed a man, or a husband. I, on the other hand, was a train wreck! There were a number of issues I was procrastinating in dealing with because I did not want to admit defeat and failure. I was an amusement, something different. I was cocky, ballsy, and wicked funny. I also kept my word, as things turned out. I had a sense of honor.

As things progressed, I keep chasing her and chasing her. One day her best friend sat me down and basically said that I had quite the set of balls to be expecting anything in the way of a permanent relationship until I took care of the issues I was procrastinating on finishing up. Me being me, I made a list as this person sat there reading me the riot act, saying that without these things being dealt with, there wouldn’t be a permanent relationship. Now, my wife and her friend didn’t believe that I would take care of all these difficulties at all, much less do it in a relatively short amount of time. But I did. I said I would, and they had laughed; but I did it.

So, after chasing and chasing, she finally let me “catch” her. Interesting. Anyway … so here we are, many years later, and still married! Amazing. We live in our dream home, with beautiful, peaceful gardens, and inspiring artwork. We share the mornings (when the sun fills the house with light) over a cup of my hand-blended Happy Budah coffee. She handles the linear logic, and I handle abstract logic. We discuss politics, art, history, travel, and laugh at The Big Bang Theory. We discuss finances together (whereas before, I was lost in this area). She has been kind enough and smart enough to allow me to pursue my dreams (writing and artwork). She has also been patient with my acquisition of guitars and amps, which we both hope I’ll be able to play fairly well someday. (I’m working on it!) While I am still not allowed to use power tools, I have been known to change out faucets and repair toilets. We are both at a point where it is OK to have some alone time without feeling jilted and neglected.

So, everything is honkey-dory, right? Silly people! This is a marriage, not a fairy tale. There are things that she will never understand. She knows my recovery is important to me, but to her, it shouldn’t be a difficulty to stay clean and sober. She is proud of me for doing it, but does not see where the difficulty is in doing so. For those of you who are with someone who is right about things 99% of the time, you know how frustrating that can be. For my part, she will never cease to be frustrated by me getting lost in a paper bag, or trying to visualize how to put something together. In fairness though, she has become somewhat more patient over the years. Are there days that we wake up and say “What was I thinking?” Sure – you bet. But she has been the best friend I have ever had. She always has my back. When life and the universe kick me in the nuts, and I dust myself off and get up, she is there to give me a hand. As much as I drive her crazy sometimes, she respects me because I have always kept my word whenever I have given it. I don’t quit. And she loves me because I still make her laugh and smile. I am very grateful to have her in my life. Best thing to happen for me so far.

To Teresa I say, thanks for letting me “catch” you. Thanks for being in my life. Thanks for sharing the day-to-day with me. Loves you mucho!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

My Guest Post at River of Thoughts

Please check out my guest post at my friend Christine Royse Niles’ blog, River Of Thoughts.

Watch What You Say (Because YOU Are Listening)

Brooklyn-Bridge-IYA-010413

Thanks … and while you are there, do check out some of Christine’s excellent posts!

Thank you Christine for having me post at your blog; very kind of you.